I’ve never had to think much about making friends. Not because I was immensely popular, or had some sort of natural gift, it just happened. You went to school, you played on the playground, parents exchanged numbers, playdates were made, instant friend.  Things got a bit more complicated from there, but the basic ingredients for friendship were readily available. A captive audience of people your own age.

College was the same way.

Post college I was fortunate enough to remain close, both in proximity and attachment, to my college friends. My high school friends began to move home as well.

So this is the first time in my adult life that I’m attempting to make friends.

And it isn’t quite as easy as I remember.

You don’t necessarily live on the same block, or have  school to commiserate over, or live in the same dorm.

So where do you look? Where do you find people?

I’ve decided to try the internet. I’ve scoured Craigslist, looking for bookclubs, activity clubs, etc. The results have been mixed at best. I joined a bookclub. It met once and then crashed and burned.  I’ve tried to join others, but those haven’t worked out for one reason or another (well, with the exception of the Asian bookclub. Who knew they wanted Asian members, not Asian authors?).

I’ve attempted activities. Well, I’ve attempted to attempt activities. I signed up for a fencing class, but apparently it didn’t hold the same interest for others so it’s been moved back to February.

I think I’m just missing the one link. The spark that will introduce me to a group of people. I’m clinging to the 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon theory. If everyone in Hollywood can connect to Kevin Bacon in 6 degrees, I should be able to find a friend or two by meeting one person, right?

So the goal of the month? Join as many groups as possible. Throw everything against the wall and see what sticks. Maybe start one myself.  I can see the posting now:

Wanted: Interesting people (or just people).

Do you have hobbies? Can you carry on a conversation? Do you leave the house (preferably with pants)? Are you human,  with a heartbeat? If so lets hang out! Me: Late 20’s (closer to 30 but whose counting? 7 months thank you very much!) New in town, generally well mannered and desperately seeking someone to lunch with.

Hmmm. It only slightly reeks of desperation.

But really, I’m optimistic. I’m settled in with the job, the holidays are over and people are sure to be looking to get out of the house. Either that or I’m going to be the crazy lady sitting on the corner trying to engage everyone who passes by in some form of conversation.

Advertisements